Age: 41
Occupation: Singer Songwriter/ Band Leader of a Kick Ass Band
Hamlet: Montauk
When did you start coming to the Hamptons and how has it changed since then?
You can pretty much gauge your time in the Hamptons based on the stores you remember so I would say Caldor, The Penny Candy Shoppe with the man who sold candy while smoking a pipe and the Red Horse Market when there was an actual red horse in front of it. That far back. My Dad worked for Grumman with a passion for fishing so as soon as my parents could get a slot at Hither Hills we were East Bound on the LIE. My first trip was when I was 4 months old and I’ve been out here every year since then. My folks then bought a cottage in Lazy Point when I was about 7 years old. We used to live on a dirt road with no telephones. Now it is paved with WIFI. Pizza Village was a big night out in Montauk and well, now someone just told me there are over 70 restaurants in town. By far the biggest change has been the post season. It used to be so quiet out here right after Labor Day. The only thing missing was tumbleweed. Now the streets are packed year round. And surfing. Holy smokes. Montauk surfing has exploded. Note to hipster surf wannabees: If you drive around with a surfboard sticking out of the back of your fabulously vintage car and it has NO WAX on it then you look like a poser. Drop off the models, but some sex wax on your stick and get wet or leave the thing at home bro. Amen.
What’s your best, worst, or most hilarious Hamptons memory?
I have a few.
Best: Years ago my boyfriend Thomas Muse, (who is now my spankolicious husband), hosted the most outrageous full moon parties at Sag Main. This was way before the drum mayhem that happens there now. It would always end with a full party skinny dip and naked surfing under the moon. Howling at midnight. Warming up with smoking towels and sleeping under the stars. Good times. Lots of young fabulous artists, writers, musicians, surfers.. You name it. It was definitely a youth moment and one for the books. The Hamptons at its finest.
Worst… Waitressing. I remember running the Clam Bar out on the strip and this party of about 20 drunk fisherman were going to walk out on a very large check. They had two waitresses crying. Finally, as manager, I went out there and they asked me what my name was. I told them “My name is Bosses Daughter.” (which I wasn’t) then I remember saying, “Well there’s one road in and one road out so have fun hiding behind a pine tree after I call the cops.” They were pissed. The Bosses Daughter who wasn’t the Bosses Daughter had them in a check head lock. They started swearing like hookers and throwing money down. Wait… Technically they were hookers… Anyway. I digress. They paid and I think I may have even gotten a tip… or did I just add 10 chowders to their check… Hmmm… I can’t remember.
Aside from that hilarious… When a very ample, young lassie stripped to nothing in front of my lead guitar player, Johnny Blood, at a summertime late night Stephen Talkouse show. She was rocking out dead ahead of him off of his stage monitor swinging her cha chas with wild abandon. We were all amused and slightly taken aback at the same time. The bouncers had to carry her out, like some naked bar Barbie, practically over the crowd. When we got to the break we all patted Johnny on the back at his good fortune. He didn’t know what we were talking about. He looked back at us in shock and then horror. “What did I miss? Are you serious? No. Really?” He had been so into his solo that he missed the whole thing. I believe the next set he wore his reading glasses instead of his sun glasses. Still makes me laugh and still make Johnny Cry.
Do you have an “inner circle” or group of friends that you hang out with most often when you’re here? If so, tell us who they are and how you met them.
Well that’s a hard one. My “inner circle”. I kind of keep these things close to my chest. However a basic mash up of who I hang with could be defined as surfer girl rock stars with a sprinkle of old school buddies and six degrees of Elmo. That’s about as close to defining my “inner circle” as I’d like to get. I will say that I have friends from all rings of the ladder out here and I love that. The prince and the pauper… Add sun, music and a sunset and everyone is dancing together beautifully.
What are your East End traditions or must-dos every summer?
Bonfires on a Monday night after a long week of gigs. Watching the kids run down the beach, marshmallows roasting, ghost stories and a chilled glass of fine French Rose. Heaven. All these little kids with sparklers and beach blankets. It’s almost annoyingly cute. I love it. I also like to go clamming, surfing and get in a few trips to Gosmans Dock to feed the seagulls. Johns Ice Cream. Long board Sundays… We need to resurrect that. Used to bring our long boards down to the beach and just chill with a big cooler and some bacci balls. This year, post baby, my schedule is getting a tad hectic. I’m looking at it and literally not taking gigs on Mondays and Tuesday so that I can have downtime to soak in some of this good stuff.
Who throws the best parties?
Ummm. Us. Ha ha. We are underground and local baby Yeah! Each August my husband and I throw something called FOTLAS. Food Of The Land And Sea. The date is set on when I catch blue claws. It is literally thrown together within about 6 hours. My friends get the call and they know… COME or miss out. I set up a long table, italian style, and every single thing consumed at our party is local. It is truly a feast and brings all of our closest friends together at a very hectic time of year to just take a moment and celebrate this amazing place that we live in and the food that we have all around us. Honor the bounty from the sea and soil. As for crazy, fun, please don’t have a camera to take a picture type of party… Well that honor belongs to Sandi and Cori Goldfarb. Hands down. As for: Who can whip up the most elegant, amazing food you’ve ever eaten and have the place looking like the inner workings of a Fairy’s dream well let’s just say it’s an honor to get on the guest list of any event catered by Janet O’Brien.
Where do you go for a drink and what’s your usual?
Depends on the time of year. Spring and Fall: The Dock in Montauk. Typically a Bass Ale. Summer: The Harvest. Drink of choice Rose or Vueve.
What’s the best thing you’ve ever eaten in the Hamptons?
I recently ate a Watermelon salad a The Surf Lodge that was literally INSANE. I put my fork down and stopped chewing to prolong the experience. That good.
Where do you go to totally unplug?
If I told you that then I wouldn’t be able to unplug the next time I go there because I would be thinking about how I told everyone about my secret spot. It’s very special and lovely and you can get half price tacos there on a Tuesday. (that would be me boldly lying to you while looking you straight in the face through your computer screen. My spot does not and never will have Tacos. At least not on Tuesdays :).
What’s your summer anthem?
Silence. When you play music for a living, and this may sound harsh unless you are a musician gigging six times a week, the one thing you crave on your day off is silence which, might I add, I don’t get since I live two blocks from Sloppy Tuna and hear their bands every weekend from my living room couch. I have full knowledge that I did that to my neighbors for years when I used to play at Nicks On The Beach so I guess I’m getting my Karmic due. At least The Tuna has good bands playing. I just close my windows which slightly defeats the point of having a house two blocks from the ocean but hey, a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do.
What’s the last thing you bought in the Hamptons?
Really? Oh man. If I’m being honest I would have to say wasp killer. If I was being fake and show offy I would say a beach cover for the back seat of my 1969 convertible cadillac. (which I didn’t really buy but since I am trying to drop my hipster car why not fake it all the way)
Last night of the summer, where can we find you and what are you doing?
If summer ended on a Saturday then I am gigging to about 428 people at the Talkhouse or whatever the hell the number it is that that place holds at capacity. If it’s a Sunday then I’m on my couch, rubbing my feet and listening to NPR. Preferably Garrison Keillor. Still picking pink boa feathers out of my hair, smiling and exhausted. My six year old is probably asking me for something to eat and my baby is probably trying to rip out a chunk of my hair but all in all I’m living in Montauk and life, no matter what day of the week it is, is good.
What’s the difference between a true Hamptonite and a weekender?
A weekender hates Monday a true hamptonite loves it. A weekender knows a good store to buy fish and a true hamptonite knows a good fisherman. A weekender longs to go to the Hamptons and a Hamptonite longs to go to Block Island.